Following an accidental fall, my father entered (walked into) a hospital in Richmond in December 2001. After a month in the hospital, following a misdiagnosis and ill-treatment, my father was left a paraplegic! He then spent a year in four hospitals and a sub-acute nursing facility. He finally came home in October, 2002 and is cared for almost entirely by my mother.
Since January of 2002, my husband has spent nearly every weekend and many times during the week traveling from our home in Northern Virginia to Richmond (about 250 miles round trip) to assist my mother with my father's care. My husband retired from his job to allow time for this care. The first week of his retirement he constructed a wheel chair ramp for my parent’s house. My father is completely bedridden. He suffers from terrible bed sores which require constant wound care, and he must be lifted out of bed by a Hoyer lift into a wheel chair.
Every month or so, my husband assumes total care for my father and gives my mother several days of respite. In February, 2003, my mother went in the hospital. She spent a week in the hospital and then two weeks recuperating. My husband stayed in Richmond the entire time taking care of all my father’s needs and assisting my mother as she recuperated. Not only does my husband do this every weekend, but through his great love for me he has sacrificed his personal ambitions and social engagements. He does this for his IN-LAWS! These are not his parents.
In addition to helping care for my father during the past two years, my husband was also on the Vestry at Truro Episcopal Church and was chairman of the Local Charity outreach Committee. This committee oversees a number of charities in Northern Virginia and D.C. devoted to helping the less fortunate, imprisoned and homeless. Additionally, he volunteered for Habitat for Humanity and served as Regional Coordinator for 11 Episcopal Churches that built one of nine homes in Fairfax, VA.
Tom also willingly helps my mentally handicapped adult sister in Richmond by providing her transportation to the store, doctor’s office, or just to take her out to get her out of her apartment. My husband was also primarily responsible for moving my sister from a house into an apartment. He then totally painted and refurbished the house for rental purpose for my parents.
During the first five months of my father’s condition, Tom worked full time for the U. S. Marshal’s Service. He gave up all of his weekends to assist his in-laws with compassion, understanding and without complaint. He is an extraordinary person who is admired and respected by friends and associates.
He has also maintained an active volunteer effort serving on the Board of the Combined Federal Campaign (CFC) (the United Way for the Federal government) and he also gave of his time to his Church as Stewardship Chairman this past Fall and currently volunteers at a local food pantry in Western Fairfax.
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